Best Parenting Advice EVER

Before becoming a Licensed Massage Therapist, I was a youth worker. I worked with thousands of youth a year. Sometimes these programs included a parental component as well. And I doled out the best. advice. ever. to those parents sitting in the room. I shamed the ones who could not make it, blaming their lack of priority on their child...sometimes I even verbalized this shame. I mean, it's your child for crying out loud, you mean to tell me you can't give up an hour of your week!?


And now I am a parent. And I have only one piece of advice to give to parents any longer:

Parent the child you have, in the moment you have.

That's it. One single piece of advice is all I've got. I used to teach parenting workshops to improve communication with your child, dole out suggestions on how to engage better with your child, and I guess I've got some thoughts on those components of parenting today. But I have no advice, only what has worked (and in some cases, what has NOT worked) for me in my messy, little family.

In fact, I wish I could go back to every single one of those parents and apologize and say, "forgive me mothers and fathers, for I knew not what I was doing...not. a. single. clue." Because the fact is, some of those parents couldn't make it to the workshop, and already felt bad about it. Some of those parents were already engaged in wonderful communication(s) with their child and didn't even use a single "family building activity" that I designed or selected for them. I go back and read those manuals and think, "my God, what beautiful writing!" and also "My God, what awful approach!" I mean, sure, as parents we could all use some refreshers, breaks, new ideas, and creative solutions to foster better relationship with our child(ren), but the last thing we need is advice. Suggestions, sure. Advice, please no.

So to all the parents out there, especially my fellow single parents: You are doing a great job! Even when you think you're not, you are! And if you're not YOU have it in you to do great! Dig deep and find that endless well of love inside you to follow my one single piece of parenting advice:

Parent the child you have, in the moment you have. Nobody knows how to do that better than you.

We live in all of our truths, unapologetic, messy, fully.